Try Again: No Fear... All Faith

Ever since the pregnancy loss, it has become the million dollar question that almost everyone asks me – Will you try again?

Each time, I never really have an answer.  Truthfully, I’ve been torn when it comes to considering actually trying again.  There’s a huge part of me that is terrified of the possibility of going through such a traumatic experience again, and if I never give pregnancy another try, I figure I’ll save myself from the risk of suffering that particular heartache and disappointment should the result from the last time repeat itself.

The reality of never having the opportunity to hold my sweet baby in my arms was deeply disappointing for me, and the thought of putting myself in a position to feel that let down again has honestly had me quite fearful.  But since I know that the Lord has not given me the spirit of fear, I knew I had to take my anxiety about conceiving straight to Him.

A few nights ago, I pulled out my prayer journal and favorite pen, and poured my heart to The Father.  I’ll give you a peek inside that intimate moment and share what I wrote...

Click to read more ...

Find the Lessons in the Pain

A few days ago, I took to my Facebook page to share my heart with my friends in regards to how I was feeling, as that particular day marked eight weeks after experiencing one of the most traumatic situations I’ve ever encountered.

Here’s what I posted:

It's been 2 months since the devastating loss of our sweet pea, and what a journey to restoration and healing it has been. I am grateful that the Lord's grace has sustained us through it all, and continues to be the glue that holds us together through all of life's unexpected changes. Though this has been a tough season for me, I would not trade it for the way I've grown closer to the Lord and increased in faith, strength, wisdom, and prayer. I've learned so much over the past two months - about life, God, myself, my marriage, purpose, grace, and the list goes on. I'll share a few with you...

Click to read more ...

An Umbrella of Grace: Inspiration for Challenging Times

t was my first day of getting back to normal after the devastating experience of pregnancy loss.  My sweet mom had just left our home after two weeks of being by my side and stepping in to take over all of my domestic duties, and I’d finally gained a little strength to leave the confines of my room and attempt to face the world – my life – again.  I was ready to begin picking up the pieces of my shattered heart and get my life back to a place of normalcy. 

I’d come to grips with the fact that although I’d taken a huge hit in the gut and was knocked completely off my feet, I couldn’t just lay there and wail and wallow in my pain. I had to get up, pull myself together, and take another swing at life. 

That’s what I’d decided to do that day.  But before I could give it my best shot, I took another hit. 

When I heard my husband’s keys at the door, I thought it was strange that less than an hour after leaving for work he was home again. He must’ve forgotten something, I thought to myself.  “Did you forget something, babe?” I asked as he walked through the door.

Click to read more ...